Do Not Forecast Grief

The first week my boys and I were home as a result of the COVID-19 quarantine, we watched the movie The End of the Sword. A life-long Elisabeth Elliot fan, I am not sure how I never read this book or saw this movie, but along with a deep emotional reaction to such a stark picture of forgiveness and redemption, I was reminded of how the story of Elisabeth Elliot captivated my friends and I as young college girls. We may have even “snuck” into a locked football stadium at the University of Oklahoma to journal and pray, just to be like her. In the reading I did after graduating from college, I somehow came across a devotional written by my still favorite author called Keep a Quiet Heart. As a single girl just beginning my teaching career, I was struck by the practical ways she demonstrated how to focus on God’s peace in various life-circumstances. There was one short devotion, however, that made a lasting impact. The title of this chapter was “Do Not Forecast Grief”. In it she recalls a chance meeting with a young mother who confided in Elisabeth all of her anxieties from finances to the health of her family members. In one portion of this devotional, she warns, “Today is mine. Tomorrow is none of my business. If I peer anxiously into the future, I will strain my spiritual eyes so that I will not see clearly what is required of me now”.

Many times in my life this phrase, “Do not forecast grief” has come to my mind: marital difficulties, pregnancy, motherhood, a new job, the threat of school shootings. There are so many times when we can expect the worst. I remember when, during my first pregnancy, a friend gave me several books on pregnancy. As a person especially susceptible to anxiety and depression, I finally had to quit reading them, not because some of the information wasn’t good, but because the chapters on all of the possible complications threw me into a panicked state, worrying about all that could possibly go wrong. Add the possibility of SIDS, autism, and leaving my child while I went to work, and there have been plenty of times I have recalled this phrase, coming back to the promise that God is in control and any pain is known by and allowed by him alone.

In this time of COVID-19, I am of course recalling these words again, as we “re-enter” a society riddled with fear and anxiety. The news and social media are rampant with people acting as if “all” people who contract this new disease will die. Some of us are so anxious, we cannot imagine that we might have to go back to work or school, even attending church is beyond our understanding at this point. I will not even attempt to address the statistics out there on COVID-19. While the studies of countries who are on the other side of the outbreak state it is no worse than the flu, projections in the U.S. vacillate wildly depending on who is reporting. In the end, the statistics do not negate God’s plan.

As Psalm 121 states:

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
    From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth.He will not let your foot be moved;
    he who keeps you will not slumber.

 Behold, he who keeps Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

 The Lord is your keeper;
    the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

 The Lord will keep you from all evil;
    he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep
    your going out and your coming in
    from this time forth and forevermore.

Are we promised a carefree life, free from disease and calamity? No. Clearly, Elisabeth Elliot suffered greatly when her husband was killed very early in their marriage, but just as God’s promises were true for her even in her time of grief, his promises are also true during this current pandemic we are navigating. He is not at a loss. As we are being “sent out” into a vaccineless world full of uncertainty, it is good to remind ourselves of Christ’s “sending out” of the disciples in Matthew 10. In this passage, he warns them that they will face certain persecution, even flogging. But despite these dangers, he warns them, “And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matthew 10:28) for “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father . . . Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows” (Matthew 10: 29, 31).

Just as Christ asked the disciples to enter a world of danger, he is asking us to do his work without fear. For many of us, this work will include interacting with a world potentially infected with this unknown virus. Is grief a possibility during these uncertain times? Absolutely, but, just like before, God has plans for us, plans that require us to live as he asks us to, plans that cannot be carried out if we allow ourselves to “forecast grief”. As Elliot suggests, “If my life is once surrendered, all is well. Let me not grab it back as though it were in peril in His hand but would be safer in mine.” During these uncertain times, it is tempting to want to “grab” our lives back, retreating into ourselves for protection from the unknown. God help us resist this temptation to “forecast grief” lest we miss the blessings he has not only for us, but for those he brings into our path.