Breathe of Life

The term “one of those days” doesn’t fit really.  It hasn’t fit for 18 months now.  In any case, I was more stressed than I’ve ever been, in ways I couldn’t quite identify.  Our school district had announced that this school year would be “mask optional” only to reverse the decision 48 hours before opening day. Some people were angry, some happy, but a general feeling of discomfort was pervasive. It was as if we were waiting for the next last minute change to drop.  Sure.  As teachers, we were ready for whatever came, ready to engage young minds despite the subpar morale, but that didn’t change the fact that this was a much different “first week” of school. 

I’ll be honest, “walking by faith” was the last thing on my mind as I tried to chorale my scattered mind into organizing my room and lesson planning, something I was desperately behind on. I recognized the name as it came across my email, but what I read next was the last thing I expected. Within seconds, I was in the middle of a testimony of a former student. She was applying to a Christian college and wanted me to edit her entrance essays, one of which asked her to tell her salvation story. Sure, I knew this student and her family. We were “familiar” and aware of each other’s commitment to the gospel, but as I read this honest account of her doubts and struggles, her desire to rebel against God and the way God had transformed her mind and her family, I was changed. All of a sudden, my heavy head lifted, my weighted heart lightened, and the stress around me melted away.

In a mere moment God used this common request to edit a college application essay to remind me, remind me that he is at work, even when I’m too self-interested to see it. In the midst of my wallowing, this extraordinary young lady-and many like her-was expectantly praying for and pursuing the future God has for her.  She wasn’t walking but forging ahead by faith, unlike me.

I didn’t truly process the transformation in my attitude until that evening.  This one small request revealed the definite sin issue I was dealing with.  No, life is not, and will never be, perfect or even predictable.  As Christ promises, “In the world, you will have tribulation” (John 16:33) and Paul warns us we will “groan” in our earthly “tent” (2 Corinthians 5:4).  Along with these acknowledgements, however, both passages offer hope, hope that is found when we are looking at the cross, not the world around us. Christ reminds us he has “overcome the world” (John 16:33) while Paul exhorts us to be of “good courage” as we “walk by faith, not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:4).

I was so ashamed.  How dare I ignore his promises because of a little dissension?  People often ask me how I work with teenagers.  “I could never do that” is often the comment I hear.  Well, while teaching has its peaks and valleys, this particular young lady was unknowingly used by God to breathe life into my “dry bones” that day, and for many to come.  And now when I see her excitedly preparing for her future, I am reminded of God’s miraculous work going on around me, even when I can’t quite see it.